


always

by explodingnebulae



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Flashbacks, Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2017-09-21
Packaged: 2019-01-01 06:34:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12150744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/explodingnebulae/pseuds/explodingnebulae
Summary: Ignis readies himself for a life he didn't think possible.





	always

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> i saw gifs of ignis and ravus for the episode ignis trailer and had an idea. i got super emotional and had to write it. sorry not sorry.

“It’s not me you think of when those lights go out and I’ve been fine with it for these two years, but you needn’t lie to me or yourself any longer. Ignis, you’re living the life of a coward and that is unlike you. I’ve spoken to my sister and she to Noctis. I will speak no further, but I suggest you wipe that blank expression off your face and prepare yourself. Don’t deny your emotions and disregard your strict reasoning. It’s not often people in your position are given this opportunity. Do not squander it…” 

Ravus is already at the door when he finishes his preachings and Ignis cannot quiet the internal sense of dread that creeps upon him. He knows full-well what has been set in motion and for all the yearning he had done in his life, he cannot fathom what would happen next. His trysts with Ravus Nox Fleuret were known to him, he could see his unstable life before him, he could see the downfall and the inevitable end when Ravus wished for something with stability and Ignis could not offer it to him. He could see his life as a chamberlain, always at Noct’s side but never how he wanted to be. But Ravus’s words made his blood run cold and he cannot bring himself to look as he listens to the door close. 

Alone in his apartment, Ignis finally brings himself to peer around the space he calls home only in name. The lights are dim in the living room, the television droning on as the news plays on it; the weather is on at current, rainy days are in store. He has a few shelves of neatly organized books and movies with a few decorative ends and trinkets he’s been given over time. Most are gifts given to him from Noct in their shared youth, and the chill he felt earlier melts with the gentle trickle of sentimentality. He permits himself to indulge in memories never forgotten. Two boys running around the Citadel together, learning, growing, laughing, and all of this done with the carefree innocence of youth. 

His gaze stops at a small jar filled with one solitary stone and a nostalgic smile spreads across his lips as he stands to examine it closer. Ignis closes the gap between himself and the bookcase and runs a finger over the smooth glass of the jar as memory sparks. 

 

_“Isn’t it pretty, Iggy?” a wide-eyed child inquires, eyes too-blue and curious for Ignis to keep from smiling. He finds nothing particularly special about the rock, but he takes it regardless; the grin on his lips mirroring the one on his companion’s features. “You gotta keep that one forever, okay? We can’t be apart if you have that stone because see, look, I found one just like it.”_

_No older than six and already sentimental. Noct holds another stone up and it is somehow the exact same as the one Ignis holds in his hand. Together, they hold the rocks to the sun and watch as they sparkle in tandem. His free hand twitches as he feels something move closer to it. He knows what it is and seizes it immediately and together they stand hand-in-hand as they stare at their stones._

_“You’ll be with me forever, right?” Noct asks later that evening while they sit in the garden, staring up at the night sky._

_“Always.” Ignis replies with a wide smile, his hand once again finding Noct’s and lacing their fingers together._

  


He removes his hand from the jar as a rueful grin pulls at his lips. It’s a sentiment repeated over and over throughout their relationship. Always together, never apart, through the strains of Noct’s marriage to Lunafreya, and tangled into the web of seclusion Ignis has weaved for himself, he always held Noct close. If only in his thoughts. 

A knock at his door sends trepidation tumbling through him, but he regains his composure as quickly as he lost it. Now is not the time to falter, he reminds himself as he moves toward the door. Ignis knows who waits on the other side and ponders for just a moment if this will really solve anything or if it will just make matters worse. He knows full well the type of attachment he has with Noct, just as he knows how unprofessional that attachment was. With that in mind, he opens the door and sees those too-blue eyes staring up at him fear and anxiety deeply woven into them. 

It’s a fear he knows too well, but alway knew just how to hide it. Noct, however, was not as fortunate when it came to being able to mask his emotions, or perhaps Ignis knew him too well and could read him with a single glance. Regardless, Ignis did not anticipate seeing that particular brand of fear on Noct’s face and it keeps him from a proper greeting. Noct, however, is quick on the uptake and speaks without hesitation. 

“We need to talk,” Noct says as he enters. Ignis shuts the door behind them and nods once. He has heard those words before from another’s mouth, yet somehow regarding the same topic. 

 

_Ravus barges into the apartment, pushing by Ignis and takes to leaning against his kitchen island. Usually when Ravus is forcing himself into Ignis’s space it’s for less savory matters, and his eyes narrow in suspicion. Whatever it is he wants, Ignis feels he may have to ask the other to take his leave. They went into this relationship knowing that it was purely physical and nothing more. Ravus understood there was to be no further discussion as to why. They were both extremely busy, too busy for any type of romance. All they were to each other was stress relief; and that’s how it would stay or Ravus could forget their arrangement altogether._

_“You do well to hide your emotions, you know, but not all is hidden. I can see the way you look at him and I can’t help but wonder what it is you’re doing with your time sneaking around with me when it’s clearly him you want. I need to hear the truth from you. I’ve known your mind to venture elsewhere when we spend time together, but never did I think it went there. Your connection to him is deeper than any I’ve seen and your loyalty is unwavering. My dear sister has told me stories of her youth when he would speak of nothing but you until she made a point to change the subject. Thus, I ask: You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”_

_Ignis feels his blood boil, the garish light shone upon his truth burns him as fire does the skin, and he cannot bring himself to look Ravus in the eye. Instead, he takes to working over his jaw as he moves further into the apartment. Guilt twists in his gut as Ravus’s venomous gaze refuses to remove itself from him. Ignis stops juxtaposition Ravus, a section of his back firmly against the smooth marble of the counter as he crosses his arms tightly across his chest._

_“I figured as much. Then why? Why waste your time fucking someone you are not interested in beyond the physical rush? I don’t mind being used, but I’d prefer knowing just what I’m being used for,” Ravus continues in an even tone, though Ignis can hear the sting of muffled bitterness in the undertones of his words. “I’m nothing like him.”  
“We had an agreement in the beginning to never make mention of our arrangement,” Ignis begins curtly, his voice as sure-footed as ever. He could only pray it remained as such. “But it seems you are not going to waver on your stance. So let me say this to you, Ravus. I will talk to you about anything, debate until my lungs give out. We can talk about anything you like, but not him. He’s not a topic to be discussed, an object or secret to be whispered about, and I will not stand here and have accusations thrown at me, regardless their pertinence. If you’ve more to say, I might ask that you refrain, for it will find you no merit here. If you wish to keep our meetings as they are, then they can, but he is something we cannot speak of.”_

_Ignis relaxes as he turns to see Ravus staring at the floor, clearly wrapped up in his thoughts. Even if he decided to speak to anyone else of this, there was nothing that could be done. Noct and Luna have been married a year and their arrangement was one that quieted a war waged several years prior. Ignis was not one to disrupt the flow of events for his own gain and he certainly would not take such a chance when so much was at risk. Not to mention he never knew Noct’s exact feelings._

  


“I ran into Ravus on the way here. He said you’d be expecting me,” Noct states quietly as he stays just inside the door, his back turned to Ignis as he speaks. His form is wavering and Ignis can all but smell the uncertainty on him. Whatever it is that he’s so afraid of saying, Ignis has recited in his head a thousand times over. Nothing could catch him by surprise more than the fact that Noct was actually standing in his apartment having this conversation. He only hopes he’s not getting ahead of himself. Ignis places his hand on Noct’s shoulder and feels as it tenses under his grip.

They share a silence as Noct’s shoulder relaxes into Ignis’s touch before turning around so they are face to face. Ignis always imagined what he would say in this situation, the day he could finally tell Noct all those words he held close to heart, always out of reach. But he falters now, coming up blank as he gazes upon the anxious man in front of him. Everything was laid bare and yet nothing is being said. Ignis wants to say something, anything, to break the silence because he knows the longer he keeps him there in the quiet, the more time he’s giving him to back out. It’s been over a year since they found themselves entirely alone in a place of complete privacy. He has to say something.

“Noct…” is all he manages to get out and that’s all he needs to say. His lifelong companion is moving closer and the hand that was on Noct’s shoulder finds its way to upward to cup his jaw and cheek. His head spins as they share a breath, inhaling and exhaling in tandem as everything strikes him with clarity. He’s here. This is real. Noct is an inch away from his lips and he can taste the scent of him on his tongue.

Not wanting to wait another second, Ignis closes the gap and guides Noct upward to join their lips in a single, painfully tender kiss. He traces the tip of his nose along the side of Noct’s before kissing him again, indulging in the softness of those lips he had spent too long thinking of. He places his other hand at the small of his back and pulls him closer still, wanting the tangible contact he thought impossible for years. Noct’s head rests against him and before long the two are sharing an embrace, wrapped entirely in the other’s arms. 

Ignis does not bother to withhold the hitch in his breath when he gazes upon Noct’s face after they separate. The genuine warmth radiating from him is contagious and it takes Ignis with little resistance. Never had he felt the elation that ruminates through him, swallowing him like an ocean he’s not afraid to drown in. With no need to force his desires and affections into the background, he feels...happy. As simply put as he can possibly make it, seeing Noct standing before him with flushed cheeks and a genial grin, Ignis Scientia is a happy man. 

“Again and don’t stop until I say,” Noct demands more than asks before leaning upwards. Not wanting to deny either of them the opportunity, Ignis gladly obliges him and seizes awkwardly seizes his lips. He always hated kissing while smiling, but there was something amazing about the experience now. Both try to keep the connection as they maneuver the apartment, but Noct breaks the kiss once to find his bearings and Ignis waits with a new kind of eagerness, something bordering excitement. “Couch.”

Before Ignis can agree or disagree, Noct’s fingers tangle into the fabric of Ignis’s shirt, guides him the rest of the way, and pushes him onto the cushions. Ignis is about to grab at Noct’s waist to pull him down when Noct raises a finger. Confusion washes over him as Noct reaches into his pocket. In his hand, he holds a stone that sets his soul alight. He watches as Noct scans the room and finds the small jar. 

“You had this our entire trip to Altissia. I know you tried to keep it hidden but I saw it one day in Lestallum. I wanted to say something then, but given what we were doing, I didn’t think it would have been the best timing. Plus the guys were there and you know how that would have gone,” he jested as he picked up the jar. “I figured you might still have it on you and I’m glad you do because this one has been looking for a home for quite some time.” 

The rock lands beside its twin with a clang in the glass jar before Noct seals it tightly. He holds it for a moment before bringing it over to the coffee table and placing it there, letting the setting sun hit the stones. They took a moment to watch as they shimmered in evening light. There’s something that feels right about what the scene, having Noct in his apartment as they explore a love nearly as old as they are. For as new as everything is, it feels timeless and proper, all anxieties pushed aside as they indulge in something they started so long ago.

“I meant what I asked that night,” Noct utters as he lowers himself to the couch. Ignis places a hand on his waist to help guide him until he’s basically straddling him on the cushion. “Forever?”

Ignis leans up and takes Noct’s lips in a slow kiss, breathing him in as his eyelids flutter delicately. It was almost embarrassing how well they fit together, how fluid and matching their actions were. They mirrored each other perfectly, as if made for each other. “Always.”


End file.
